preparing your body to carry a faux baby is pure punishment.
first we start with (and continue for a while) multiple ultrasounds which are done to monitor your lining and make sure you don't ovulate. and i'm not referring to the nice on the tummy ultrasound. oh no! i'm referring to the weenie wand all up inside your ladyparts kinda ultrasound. not that it's painful or anything, but it's not the most pleasant when the md moves that thing alllllll the way to the left to see how pretty your ovary is! add in blood draws to monitor your hormone levels and i call myself the human pincushion! C:
well that doesn't sound so bad you say. ok. how about swallowing down horse pills and like 2-3 of them. all right, only the prenatal pill could choke an elephant, but add a baby aspirin and some progesterone and if you have a fear of choking on pills i guarantee this will feed right into that fear!
ultrasounds, pills, blood draws! that's all you got? not by a long shot my friends! bring on the lupron! small tiny insulin needle in your belly. more like a bee sting pain than anything else. i usually numb the area with some ice and am good to go.
so by now you may be thinking i could live with all of that. well let's throw in some big momma shots! i'm talking estrogen and progesterone - in oil. now for those of you unfamiliar with surrogacy "in oil" doesn't mean anything to you. allow me to explain. "in oil" means that the medicine is in the thickest, gooiest, knarliest looking liquid you've ever seen! it takes a HUGE needle to draw to draw it up and a smaller one to inject it. which means it takes a few seconds to get all the yummy goodness into your heiny.
a few shots in the butt? come on! how about a few shots for 12+ weeks people! today i started the estrogen shots. they are thick but definitely not as nasty as the progesterone. these shots are only twice a week for the next 3 weeks until the transfer. then bring on the progesterone! everyday for the whole 1st trimester! now why would a healthy woman who can carry her own pregnancies require such torture? well when you get prego the old fashioned way you release an egg that leaves a corpus luteum that naturally releases the above mentioned hormones that help sustain a pregnancy. no ovulation, no hormones. (i wish i could just drink the stuff!)
so 12 weeks in and now that my head is outta the toilet i begin to feel great! i actually love being pregnant. some people find that fact weird, but honestly i am calm and nice and love feeling that human being wiggle around in there. i even love giving birth! i love it so much i did it sans pain medicine last time and will never again in my childbearing/birthing life have an ounce of pain medicine (so says i now)! so the baby's born and handed over to her parents and most people think we surro's become sad. actually it's quite the opposite. i am so overjoyed at seeing a family completed that it makes the previous 11 months of pure punishment worth every needle stick, ultrasound, big shot in the a$$, contraction, and nauseous moment focus into the best job i've had the privilege to complete.